Towards the Light

by Mad Jester

Original Action Adventure Fantasy Romance Harem Virtual Reality
Sameul was an ordinary guy. Until the day of his accident that robbed him of his legs. Join him as he travels through the world of Atreties, the virtual reality world of Monster Mayhem Online, as Abrum, who is of the unique race, Angaellis. Watch as he files his way though this new world and gathers forces together that consist of monsters, demons, animals, and humans, but to him, they all fall under the mysterious category known as female.
(Notice: Since this is my first fiction, the beginning chapters are quite unskilled. It gets better as it goes along in my opinion, with the culmination of experience)
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Mad Jester

Mad Jester

Insanity Incarnate

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Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
The day of Ouch ago
Chapter 1: Character Creation ago
Chapter 2: Training ago
Chapter 3: Training... Part Two! ago
Chapter 4: Mark of the Angaellis and the Foxes Story ago
Chapter 5: Near Drowning ago
Chapter 6: Stories ago
Chapter 7: Information Gathing and a Holy Battle ago
The Surprising Development ago
A Ball-Busting Day ago
Succubus and Angaellis ago
Return ago
Duel and Sparring ago
Failure to Protect ago
A New Companion ago
Orthir's Region ago
The Wolf Lord and Cala ago
Blood of the Angaellis ago
Beast Mode... Activated ago
Bleeding Out ago
A Light through the Hate ago
Moonlit Crisis ago
Moon Strider ago
But You Can't Take My Experience! ago
New Styles ago
Wolf Moon ago
Discussion ago
In the Shadow ago
Of a Broken One ago
Aftermath ago
Elves...*sigh* ago
Sins of a Slaver ago
Reunion ago
Back in Town ago
Behind Door #1... A PERVERTED ELF ago
Take Meh to Church ago
Not a chapter, just a really funny suggestion ago
Happy Announcement ago
The Beginning of the Extermination ago
Bad News ago
The Wicked are Doomed to Fall ago
Collision ago
New Title for Sequel? ago
Rejoice my Viewers! ago
FINALLY GOT AROUND TO IT, on a different note ago
Reviews

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AziroFF
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this ff has potential but.....

man you're rushing everything and if you've chosen to create a virtual reality ff you should create tablets about is stats and when he trained you shoulda sayd he trained that many hours and gained those stats and again and again,etc.

the plot has things from other ff's witch isn't a bad thing but you don't explain,you shoulda form an image for us to see it,to imagine it about how would it be to be there at that moment.....sorry for the harsh criticism but i can't even look at all the chapters,ive looked only at the first 4....and its not as if you have grammar mistakes,you don't witch is good,verry good,...anyway you can do it but you're still rough for now....

keep it going and dont give up and sorry for the low raiting ,really can't give more....

Lonjest
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Read this first on Japtem

Glad to see you took my advice and posted on here as well. Should allow you to get more feedback on your FF. If people comment for ya lol

 

From the several chapters I read so far, I’m very interested in this FF. And hope with enough constructive criticism to improve as you write :)

ButcheredSoul
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Simple, Quite liking the story

 If you are to flesh it out a bit more and take it a bit slower, the story would be quite better. Slow down and bit and introduce more details, and other than that, I like it :)

tonyorobsky
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Can be better, and probably will

After reading until "A new companion"

The MC got 7 levels before the succubus quest, and when he get the wolf after the succubus quest he is still level 7. He should have leveled up after that quest. Did you forget all the books he red in the library?? What about the stats he gained there?? You're not carefull enough with the status, status points, levels, skills, fame... (for both the mc and the girls, whose status is still unknown, even an occasional gamer would have already checked them). He meet new girls too fast, and making his teacher the legendary guy feels weird (especially since he still looks quite healthy and powerfull, don't see a good reason to make him stay in this unpopular training center while he could still be on active duty)

With all that said, I still like your story a lot and I'm waiting for the following chapters :D

lorenzo86
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I really liked what i read so far , can't wait for the updates . Definitly making it one of my favorites :)

 

Diosisis
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like the story wish it went a little slower in some spots and faster in others.

Sirantulas/That guy
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I like it very much. Though you could number the chapters could be numbered because it gets quite confusing

Raizen
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This is a great story I like the use of parts of Trinity Online ff. The only thing I would say is that I hope you plan to address is underwhelming amount of mana. I think it will be very hard to take the story very far unless he has the mana to perform some of the abilities I would imagine he will gain that would require it. 

wezard
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 Hi I am not good at this but I will tell you a few thing that made me a bad impression. Repeating the thoughts with the same words, when you were explaining sometimes you were repeating the same thing like the case with orino walking out of the woods. Your writing style needs a little bit more work and Please add Enter your sentences like in chapter 11 -14

uno
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This fiction has an interesting concept of "monster" taming which I really enjoy. All in all its very good! The only thing is hopefully in the future the MC opens up to his harem (more perverted ;) or he becomes more romantically involved with them! Anyways keep up the good work! Oh ya for the chapter lengths, longer is better but I would like more content with faster updates!