The Lucky Clover

by Jostag

Original Action Adventure Fantasy Romance Harem
Warning This fiction contains:
  • Sexual Content
Clover's a rather unfortunate guy who's been named rather poorly by his parents. As a result he's been a social outcast all his life. In short his life sucks. Then a tragedy strikes and his world is turned upside down.

So begins the epic adventure of the Lucky Clover. A story filled with swords, action and perhaps a little romance on the side.
  • Overall Score
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  • Total Views :
  • 577,639
  • Average Views :
  • 10,899
  • Followers :
  • 768
  • Favorites :
  • 237
  • Ratings :
  • 73
  • Pages :
  • 202
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Jostag

Jostag

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Table of Contents
Chapter Name Release Date
Chapter 1: The Mislade Misfortune of the "Lucky" Clover. ago
Chapter 2: The Second Chance ago
Chapter 3: Restart Life Start! ago
Chapter 4: Tag Your Well Wishes ago
Chapter 5: Lifelong Lessons from My "Dear" Father ago
Chapter 6: A Father's Legacy ago
Chapter 7: A Rocky Start ago
Chapter 8: An Education. ago
Chapter 9: Popping the Question ago
Chapter 10: “Luck” Strikes Again ago
Chapter 11: Black and White ago
Chapter 12: Riddle Me This ago
Chapter 13: Revisiting the Past ago
Chapter 14: Risk and Reward ago
Chapter 15: Damsel’s offer ago
Chapter 16: Bed and Breakfast ago
Chapter 17: Cat and Mouse ago
Chapter 18: Good Fortune ago
Chapter 19: The Game of Life and Death ago
Chapter 20: The Talk ago
Chapter 21: Special Talent ago
Chapter 22: The Next Step ago
Chapter 23: Be As One ago
Chapter 24: Boy Meets World ago
Chapter 25: Safety Announcement ago
Chapter 26: Where the $!#% Are We? ago
Chapter 27: A Sticky Situation ago
No Chapter today ago
Chapter 28: Limits ago
Chapter 3: Alt. Version (NOT CANON) - 100k Views Bonus ago
Chapter 29: Regroup ago
Chapter 30: Answers ago
Chapter 31: Plan for Success ago
Chapter 32: Desire ago
Chapter 33: The Darkness ago
Chapter 34: The Light ago
Chapter 35: An Experiment ago
Chapter 36: The Cost ago
I am back sort of... ago
Chapter 37: Magical Words ago
Chapter 38: Action ago
Chapter 39: Reveal ago
Chapter 40: Storytime! Part 1 ago
Chapter 41: Storytime Part 2 ago
Chapter 42: Storytime Part 3 ago
Chapter 43: Storytime Part 4 ago
Temporary Stop ago
Chapter Recap ago
Chapter 44: Signups ago
Chapter 45: Tournament Arc! Part 1 ago
Been a while hasn't it? ago
Chapter 46: Tournament Arc! Part 2 ago
Chapter 47: Tournament Arc! Part 3 ago
Reviews

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fumiyu
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Lacking in a lot of areas

1. The beginning of the story is lackluster, if you can get past it, then it would be an ok start. The development is, however, interesting. But even if the story was interesting, it won't draw you in directly into the story unless you are into to the genre.

 

2. The grammar needs a lot of work. There are a lot of grammatical errors and honestly, commas are barely used. Commas are very important, and it will give a lot of impact to the mood if used properly. Other times however, the word order or sentence structure are jumbled up, and it feels like I'm reading a grade school child write a story.

 

3. The characters feel like robots. The reason for this is because they feel like they're acting based on what the story tells them to do. What this means is that the characters don't have a mind of their own, and their actions are all being manipulated like puppets—especially the dialogue. Basically, they are skeletons. The characters have no depth, and they need some meat on their bones (also a skin!).

The dialogue is very lacking, I find it hard to read through the dialogue at all because there doesn't seem to be any coherent dialogue going on between characters. The main characters so far don't interact much with each other—even less to their surroundings. Every time the characters talk to each other, it feels like they are reading each other a script, in which their personalities are non-existent in their words.

4. The good part about this is that it has an interesting story and has a lot of flexibility. If everything bad is ignored, this is an overall good story.

nedri
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As it is, this is one of those stories that you would read just to pass the time. By this, I mean that you do not get to connect to the characters well. The author does not put thoughts behind the actions of each character. Since the characters lack depth, the story also suffers in extension. The grammar used isn't too bad, but the style of writing is lackluster.

My advice to the author would be:  instead of writing the story as you (as the weaver of the story) see it, write it from the point of view of the characters that you have created. Write it as if YOU were the one in the adventure. Now how would you feel in that situation? You and your dear friend 10 years old. Both of you cold and shivering with your clothes hanging from your backs with the wet and cold acquired from the terrible storm outside. Bruised and battered from the tumble down the slope, almost ending in both of your untimely demise had it not been for divine luck. The simple thought of it sending a deep shiver down your spines. Nicks and cuts all over, some still refusing to yield their release of your blood. Rattled and shaken, scared from your close brush death. As a 10 year old (or even as a 30 something year old in the body of a 10 year old), this has gotta be a traumatic experience so don't just disregard this! Don't just WRITE the scenario. FEEL the scenario. Now, stuck in an unknown cave without light, are you panicking? No? What's giving you the courage, stuck in the hellhole you found you and your friend in? You're mentally 30 something, but your friend isn't. Does she break down like a proper 10 or 11 year old?

Moving on. I apologize for the long-ish critique, but I am just giving you (and all readers of this review) advice for your improvement. Note that reading stories such as yours and giving these reviews, I am also giving myself pointers in the case that I ever do write my own stories. Of course, if you want to stick to your style of writing and do not wish to write a fully immersive work, then do whatever makes you happy. As they say, disregard it at your own risk or discretion.


In more straightforward terms, this serves more like the script of an adventure rather than placing the reader in the adventure, itself. For readers looking to immerse themselves in a story, it's unfortunate to say, but the way it is right now, this isn't it.

Warzz13
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orz..... Just kidding ! Its an awesome read

Great Fanfic !! I’m liking the story so far (although i would like for some battle chapters or something but i’m not the author so feel free to do whatever) I’m liking the pace so far and I hope that this would be a lasting read (a few hundred chapters or so)…. well that’s all i would like to say and best of luck and….   Congratulations!!! You have gained : +1 Follower +10 Fame
agustis
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Needs some work but over all very impressive.

My main complaint is that the chapters are way to short! I think you can combine 2-4 chapters at a time rather than have have such short chapters.

The story is very intriguing and original so that really good :).
Grammar needs a bit of work but not really that big of an issue.
Style too short and sometimes confusing wording.
Character, very classy and fun but not too original. 

eszefvsdf
  • Overall Score
You might like to add some interactions between the people of the world and your characters. Its nice to see the main characters but having interactions with the world can give some reprieve for the mind (aka so that we dont get tired of your your characters). An example from LMS would be the rumors from townspeople, their feelings towards the mc and some minor characters.
dementedreality
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Doesn’t have major issues with grammar, but also doesn’t really draw you into the story. The world building lacks a certain umph.  Plot has interesting development so far, but isn’t stellar.

Nalen
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interesting premise, it sort of reminds me of MT, and I like your protagonist isn't overpowered from the start.   Does clover still have a feminine appearance?
Mjolnir77
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The Story seems good so far, i'll update my vote with the next chapters.
Lonjest
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Pretty good, most people would like longer chapters but your the writer so do it your way and continue to enjoy it.
roennie
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I am enjoy it.. please keep your  good work .. waiting for your fast update..